Friday, July 4, 2008

complicated...isnt it??

it was hurt...when we waited for sum1 to fill our loneliness...but it turn out to be nothin..i've waited for him...but he remains silence...wat am i to him...?am i really he need...love is always hurt...when we found sum1...which complete us..it didnt turn out to be the love we wanted too...til today 3rd of july...he remains silence...n i've been wondering...do he ever think of me...once...once...did ever?
when i think bck wat he do to me...it makes me shed a tears...y did he do diz?he dun love me?he afraid?he running away frm me?he found a new love?he afraid of the risk?or he...bored wit me?
as he remains silence...i was silence too...coz im afraid if im disturbin him...i juz let God decide evrytin...im juz tired...of this hurtin love...i juz dunno wat to do...or wat he felt towards me...it doesnt seems clearly..n dat really hurts..when i follow my emotion, i wanted him...to tell da truth...whether...he like me or not..if he fall for another girl..he shud tell me...coz i hate being lied or being cheated..i've been cheated..many times..n it is really hurt...when i misses him...i see his picture...i read all his messages...but y..he do this to me...do he really love me...God...Please help me...sumtims i wonder...am i anything to him...or am i burden him....wit my emotion...i juz wanna be wit him all the time..that's all..was im wrong...i want to share evrytin wit him...tears...laugh...problems...everything...Oh God...please let me see it clearly...now...is wat im hanging to...only one....so keep on being patience...waiting for him to come to me...even when the message says...hello...its enough for me...praying to God...wish this suffer end...with hepiness and laughter...i dunno wat God decide for me...n i know God love me as i love Him...so...He decide for us...wat is the better for all the livings...its better for me...to be patience...patience is the key here...doing my stuff, my work, my study...as hard as it cud be...achieve my ambition...even he was not at my side...juz pray...mayb 1 day...he will realize...im waiting for him...right here..wish he cud grab me...hug me...n we shed the tears together...and i hav to be strong to face it...
"the more tears were shed for a finished story rather than an unfinished one.." says Truman Capote.

why do girls are having this stage of life...which...we gonna feel hurt...even it nothins to boys...before this...i dun even care bout "love"...which...i dun believe in it...but wat do i feel now...its juz..not me...im insane...sumtims i cried...i smile...alone...i wish i cud be like my old days...which is...i felt nothin...im more compete to meve forward...but now...i've no strength to do it...y? why? y? Give me the answer...plz...

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